My theme this week is New Year Blues and HOW TO KEEP EVERY RESOLUTION WITHOUT FAIL
We have all done it. We make New Year resolutions; maybe struggle to keep them for a few days, make ourselves miserable and then lapse back into our old habits by the end of January. Sure, we may keep a few of these during our life but, for most, it is a losing battle.
The key lies in the word 'resolution'. When we make these promises to ourselves, we should drop the 're' bit of the word and concentrate on the 'solution'. Consider why people make resolutions. It is usually because there is some aspect of their life they want to change for the better. Then, instead of focusing on the great benefits that they will achieve, they focus on what they are giving up so, of course they fail.
In this life you attract whatever it is that you think about the most. If you think about negative words like giving up, stopping, doing less or changing something that you have enjoyed for years, then it is inevitable that your subconscious will rebel to ensure that it does not happen.
Instead of thinking about resolutions, think about solutions. Think about how you will look, feel and sound when you have found the solution. Instead of thinking about what you may be giving up, think about what you will gain. Remember too that there is no success or failure; there is only a result. Don't beat yourself up if the result is not what you planned, just change something and start again.'
People fail with New Year resolutions for two reasons. The first is that they try to change the habits of a lifetime overnight and the human mind and body doesn't work like that. The other is that they attempt to do it alone. The help and support of a non-judgmental and uncritical third party is crucial to a good outcome.
Many coaching clients think that setting a resolution is all that it needs however people need to fully appreciate why they choose what they choose and to examine their commitment to the change. Then you need to define strategies for creating the change with small action steps that will bring you gradually closer to your goals.
New Year solutions are great if they get you thinking about your life. Remember, you can start work on a new solution at any time. The power of personal change is just too good to be limited to the first few days of the year and it really is possible to keep every resolution without fail.
Here are my 5 Steps to Unlock Your Full Potential this New Year
- Get You!
You are talented, clever, utterly unique, totally special. There's no-one else quite like you. No-one else has the combination of skills and aptitudes that you have. You have an exclusive range of innate talents. Make sure that you get you. See yourself clearly and honestly. Don't be coy. False modesty will get you nowhere. List your special skills and talents. Spread them out on paper for yourself to see.
- Get smart
Look at those talents. Now use your imagination to explore how you could use them. Think beyond fitting into a job. Think beyond paper qualifications. Focus on how those intrinsic abilities of yours could be put to good use. Think 'How could I provide a valuable service'? If you are a brilliant administrator, organiser, level-headed and calm in a crisis, you don't have to be an Office Manager. Those skills could lead to all sorts of fascinating business possibilities.
- Identify a need
Look around you, at your immediate vicinity and just beyond. What is the service that you could provide – brilliantly – that people would be delighted to have and pay for? Where is the gap that you could fill, using all those skills and abilities of yours to the max? This is about you spending yourself well, fulfilling your potential to the fullest, making the most of what you've got, of what you've been given.
- Shake yourself
Life can get stale and safe. You could get to look a little tired and dull yourself. You are not dull, but your life may be. The moment you notice this is happening, stop and take stock. Know that change is essential; a few risks are unavoidable if you're to liven yourself up. This is the time to meet new people, do something different, move house, set up that new business, lose weight, start running, throw a party, spring-clean and polish that life of yours. There has to be more to it. It just has to be fabulous. You won't settle for anything less.
- Think Big
Don't think, 'what would be possible'? Think, 'what would be fabulous'? Give yourself permission to admit -to yourself- what would be really great, what sort of a life, lifestyle you'd ideally like, would be perfect for you. It's probably not that remote, but entirely within your reach. You must allow yourself to get excited about your life. This desire will propel you to push yourself forward, stretch yourself to make your move, take a risk, get things moving. Remember, the very pursuit of your dreams makes life more interesting – immediately.
This article was written by Angela D Gardner, life coach at www.tictokology.com.