| Law of Attraction and Effective Parenting
Struggle is not part of the natural order of life. One never
sees a cherry tree struggle to produce blossoms when given the
right environment. Why? Because the tree is simply following its
purpose--its basic nature. Fortunately, struggle does not have
to be part of the parenting equation either. This is good news
for many parents because if we choose to use the law of
attraction we can experience a happier, more peaceful and
respectful home. Yes, this can even mean eliminating
award-winning temper tantrums for good. Sound too good to be
true? Read on.
What is Attraction Parenting?
Attraction parenting employs the principle that the behavior we
experience in our home we have attracted to us by our thoughts,
deeds and actions. You see, the people around us, especially
those closest to us (like our children), simply reflect and
respond to our own feelings and actions. As much as we would
like to blame our kids for their behavior (especially when they
are pushing every button we have, plus some we never knew we
had!), generally our kids' only mirror what is going on within
us.
So, if your kids currently have you spluttering and dog-paddling
in the "parenting deep end", it may be time to ask yourself:
- How am I contributing to my kids behavior? (Gulp!) - Are my
kids responding to my lack of patience and skyrocketing stress?
-
Are my children desperately seeking quality time with me
because I haven't been giving them much special time lately?
-
Are my kids no fun to be around because frankly, I am not fun to
be around?
Answering these questions truthfully can quickly get to the root
cause of their misbehavior.
The Secret Parenting Law of Attraction Tips
There are four parenting tips below that can positively transform
any household of chaos, frustration and stress into harmony, joy
and peace.
The Secret Parenting Law of Attraction Tip #1 - You are modeling
for your children how to behave each moment of every day.
Children watch what we do far more than they listen to what we
say. Thus, if you yell at them to be quiet, push them to do what
you want them to do, and use a disrespectful tone when
frustrated - you only teach them how to treat you. Stop! Take a
breath and make a commitment to walk your talk. Model for your
child how a happy, healthy and sane human being looks, talks and
acts. Then watch them follow your lead.
The Secret Parenting Law of Attraction Tip #2 - You are your
child's most powerful self-esteem mirror.
Your child seeks approval from you more than anyone else. You
are the mirror that tells them how deserving or unworthy they
are. They will believe whatever you reflect to them - positive or
negative! Overt and even subtle put-downs can be devastating to
their sense of self-worth and wellbeing. When a child has low
self-esteem they will often act out, misbehave and drive you
nuts! By using the power of positive words and actions to
encourage, rather than discourage, you can be a beacon of light
illuminating your child's worth. This gift of positive mirroring
can inspire your child to believe in themselves, follow their
passions and ultimately be someone who is a delight to be
around. Therefore, choose to reflect your child's brilliance,
special god-given talents, and worth by being grateful for what
they are and do.
The Secret Parenting Law of Attraction Tip #3 - The more you
focus on the positives of your child, the more you will
experience them.
One of the most powerful aspects of the law of attraction is
that whatever you focus on, expands. Thus, if you spend much of
the day nagging about all the things your child isn't doing, or
all the bad things your child is doing, you simply attract more
of these frustrating experiences to you. Instead, we can take
affirmative steps to create the behaviors we want by simply
noticing and being grateful for what we do like. One of my
favorite parenting gratitude techniques is what I call the "Dog
Factor!" You know how dogs unconditionally show us love and
affection--greeting us at the door enthusiastically, whether
we've been gone for two days or two minutes? Well, apply this
approach to your own family. Beam with love when they come home
or when they enter the room. Remember that no matter what you
are experiencing right now with your family, there are thousands
of people in this world (like those who can't have kids!) who
would gladly trade places with you.
The Secret Parenting Law of Attraction Tip #4 - Discipline only
teaches children to do better next time, when they feel better.
This is probably the most difficult parenting tip to accept.
Discipline doesn't have to feel bad to be effective. In fact,
most discipline that is based on punitive punishment (things
like yelling and taking away privileges), only teaches our kids
to lie, and not get caught next time! You reap what you sow.
Thus, if your punishment is focused on rehashing all the bad
things your child has done, you are only attracting more of this
bad behavior to you in the near future.
For discipline to really inspire children to do better next time
it needs to:
- Be respectful
- Focus on the solution (and how to do better
next time)
By filling our home with gratitude for all we do have and with
positive words and actions, we can begin to experience more
pleasant interactions and actively create the family life of our
dreams.
About the author:
Kelly Nault-Matzen, MA, family counselor, corporate parenting
spokesperson and award winning parenting author of When You're
About To Go Off The Deep End, Don't Take Your Kids With You
shares time-tested tools that motivate children to want to be
well behaved, responsible and happy! To gain access to more
parenting tools and to access your free online parenting course
visit www.ultimateparenting.com |
