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Most parents worry about their child trying drugs. Possible signs of drug use can include changes in appearance, friends, interests, eating and sleeping habits, moods and openness. The difficulty is that these signs are very often a natural part of growing up, so a young person who is not using drugs, could show the same changes. It is frustrating for parents who are trying to look out for the signs of drug use, but the fact is, there are no easy answers. Although many parents may feel comfortable talking to their children about alcohol, they may feel that they don't know enough about drugs to tackle the subject properly. Also, they may be concerned that raising the subject of drugs will lead to their child experimenting with them, but there is no evidence to support this. When parents are worried that their child is taking drugs or drinking a lot of alcohol, they are often unsure about how to react. Conversations can turn into lectures, accusations and rows. You might find the following advice helpful: - try not to accuse your child as this will probably start a row; and if you are wrong, your relationship with them could be damaged;
- try to find a time when you feel able to discuss the situation without interruptions;
- Don't try to discuss their drug use with them while you believe they are under the influence of a drug. This is especially important if your child has used gases, glues or aerosols;
- decide how you want to react if your child tells you that they have used drugs;
- ask them to talk about their views and try to listen with respect to what they say;
- if you suspect that your child is lying to you about their drug use, try not to get angry;
- show them that your main concern is for their health and well-being
- make sure they know that you will be there to help them through any difficulties they come across;
- make clear to them what behaviour is acceptable to you, and what you won't tolerate;
- try not to threaten them with punishment - this might seem to offer a quick solution, but it is unlikely to give the results you are looking for
- make sure they understand that they are responsible for their actions and the consequences that follow.
It is also important to remember that alcohol can also cause serious problems for young people. Children become aware of alcohol at an early age. Most have their first alcoholic drink between 10 and 13, and this first drink is usually at home with their parents' permission. However, some children start experimenting without their parents' knowledge - they might help themselves from the family's drinks cupboard, or at family occasions.By 13, young people may have started drinking in groups, in a park or at parties. The group may be passing round cans or bottles and may drink quickly because they are afraid of being found out or because they want to get drunk. When young people start going to pubs, drinking often means getting drunk. If you are concerned that your child has started drinking try to react calmly. Explain to them why you are worried and make sure your child understands the risks involved in misusing alcohol. You can help your child to cut down the risks by - encouraging them to stick to lower-strength brands and not to drink too quickly. Explain the dangers of spiking someone else's drink
- agreeing rules on parties. Be around, or close at hand, if your child has a party at home. Remove temptations such as your own stock of drink (especially spirits) and provide starchy food (bread, rice and pasta) so they won't be drinking on empty stomachs. If your child is going out to a party, remember to ask where the party is being held
- making sure your child has a way of getting home safely at night
If you have any questions about drug or alcohol misuse, check in drugrapp help for an agency near you who can give help and advice.
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